Wellington

Wellington. As if it needs our help. You already know that the people are cooler, the arts scene more vibrant, the coffee better-tasting. You already know that you can walk everywhere and that even when you don't, the public transport is immaculate. Honestly, trying to sell you on Wellington feels like trying to convince you that Natalie Portman is quite good looking. If anything we want to run it down to give the other cities a chance.

The fact is, you're going to love Wellington. Even if you're some sort of un-pleasable monster, who doesn't like cocktails or paintings or fashion or food or books, you'll still feel at home here, because there's a section of the city devoted to people who stubbornly don't like any of the things that other people like. It's called Cuba Street.

Don't forget Wellington has the Hurricanes, too. It's like finding out that the cool, popular boy who constantly tops your high school art class is also the best player in your first XV. We know, the Hurricanes aren't the most successful Super 15 team by any stretch, but the locals are so supportive that every year they get some of the biggest crowds in the competition.

We're not even going to bore you with a list of things to do while you're here. Walk out your hotel door and stroll around the block: you'll have a choice of six plays, nine restaurants, eleven bars and half a dozen music gigs in which to spend the next hour of your life. They used to have a What's On guide, but now they call it What Isn't On. It's smaller.

Thank goodness they occasionally screw up. Like that "Wellywood" sign - ahhh, didn't it make you feel better that even Wellington has stupid ideas some times? It's called schadenfreude. We're not proud of it, but it makes us feel so very, very good.